Author’s Note: I know, this is technically late. Even though it’s not yet midnight where I live. Anyway, sorry for not posting the new LGDK this week. Instead it’s this crossover Christmas Special. And this has a special guest as well. If you wanna know who it is… then read the whole thing. Suffer at reading something that’s over 25 pages long! Something that I spent most of the day writing for you! Anywho, please enjoy?
LGDK/LSPL 2016 Christmas Special!!!
Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the house. Not a creature was stirring, not even a mouse–
What do you mean no? Also, you cannot interrupt the Narrator!!!
“I can when it’s you, Spoiler-san!” (Coy)
Whatever, we need to get this special underway.
“But you forget, Christmas is a holiday that’s not in my world.” (Coy)
“Same with my current one.” (Niko)
“Niko, what are you doing here?” (Coy)
“Don’t forget, LSPL is in the title. So it’s kinda an inter-company crossover.” (Niko)
“You have me there.” (Coy)
If you two would, Spoiler-san would like to get this underway?
“Whatever, just stop with referencing ‘Twas the Night Before Christmas”?” (Niko)
Fine… let’s get the first skit underway.
Coy and Yuki’s “Gift of the Magi”
It was Christmas time again for Coy and Yuki… in a non-canon land that’s not part of the LGDK universe. Coy’s a factory worker and Yuki’s a teacher, don’t ask. Anyway, money was tight with the usual finances. But both of them wanted to buy each other a good gift for Gift Day– I mean Christmas! Yuki was talking with her fellow teacher Miyuki.
“Miyuki-chan, I just don’t know what to get my husband for Christmas.” (Yuki)
“Is there anything he would like, Yuki-senpai?” (Miyuki)
“Well… he is really fond of his revolver–” (Yuki)
“But don’t those go against the Japanese Sword and Firearm Possession Law?” (Miyuki)
“Miyuki… we’re not in Japan.” (Yuki)
It took a moment for Miyuki to realize that this is true.
“That’s right, Miyuki forgot that we’re in a non-canon world right now. Please forgive Miyuki, Yuki-senpai?” (Miyuki)
“Only if you stop it with the third person and breaking the fourth wall, the former is Spoiler-san’s MO and the latter is my department.” (Yuki)
“All right. Anyway, does he have a holster?” (Miyuki)
“He does… but it’s very worn out. It actually has pieces of duct tape holding part of it together right now.” (Yuki)
“Then get him that.” (Miyuki)
“But… would that be a good idea? It goes against how I feel about him using his revolver.” (Yuki)
“That shouldn’t matter, Yuki-senpai. It’s Christmas, the time that you think of your loved ones.” (Miyuki)
“You know what… you’re right. I’ll see about it after school.” (Yuki)
And now let’s check on Coy talking about the same thing with his co-worker Niko at the uh… banana factory?
“Niko… I just don’t know what to get my wife for Christmas.” (Coy)
“Just like I don’t know why Spoiler-san has us working together despite being from two different novels? Especially at a banana factory.” (Niko)
“Could you please not break the fourth wall right now? That jerk’s gonna complain about us ruining the skit.” (Coy)
Which Spoiler-san is already mad about.
“See? He’s doing it already.” (Coy)
“Fine… I’ll stop.” (Niko)
Anyway, getting back on track…
“Is there anything she’d need? Like for something she already owns?” (Niko)
“Well… she keeps saying that she wants to get a frame for her rare Pr*Cur* poster.” (Coy)
“Wait… are you seriously censoring “PreCure” right now?” (Niko)
“Niko, blame the author.” (Coy)
“Good point. I mean, in past chapters of your story he’s referenced both Maoyuu Maou Yuusha and Black Butler in all but name.” (Niko)
And for continuing to break for fourth wall, the setting has been changed to a fish cannery and both Coy and Niko are wearing uniforms that smell of fish.
“Ugh! My nose!” (Coy)
“Hey, it’s not that bad.” (Niko)
“You try being the one with the sense of smell of a dog! Remind me to shoot you after this skit.” (Coy)
“Okay… I’m sorry.” (Niko)
“Whatever, just get back to the damned script.” (Coy)
“Fine. Anyway, why not get her a good frame for her poster?” (Niko)
“Ya know what? That’s a good idea. I’ll see about it after our shift’s over. (Coy)
Meanwhile while the two worst Main Characters were still working at the fish cannery (Spoiler-san is not changing it back to a banana factory), Yuki had just got off from work and was in the shopping district. She was at a gun store looking at holsters.
“I swear… this is not where I belong.” (Yuki)
Anyway, she noticed that she didn’t have enough money for what she saw to be the best holster that Cecil the owner of the gun store had recommended.
“Wait… why does Cecil run a gun store?” (Yuki)
“Meh, I stopped questioning the roles when they handed us the scripts.” (Cecil)
“You have a point.” (Yuki)
“Now let’s stop breaking the fourth wall before Spoiler-san gets mad again, ya know?” (Cecil)
“All right. Anyway, are you sure this is a high quality holster?” (Yuki)
“It’s leather is made from Gore Grizzly skin, so it’s durability is the best on the market.” (Cecil)
“But it’s… so expensive.” (Yuki)
“What else do you expect from the quality, ya know?” (Cecil)
“True… I’ll be back later.” (Yuki)
Our heroine then left Cecil’s gun store to ponder what to do in this situation.
“I really want to get Coy that holster, but it’s so expensive. Just what do I do?” (Yuki)
She then saw a store that specializes in things that interest otaku’s such as herself.
“This place is both buy and sell? I think I have an idea.” (Yuki)
Hours later after Coy had just got off of his shift at the fish cannery, he entered a store for otaku goods which was run by Wells.
“Wells? Why do you run a store for anime and manga memorabilia?” (Coy)
“I don’t really get that much screen time in LGDK. Also, you stink.” (Wells)
“Hey, blame Niko for angering Spoiler-san.” (Coy)
“Fair point. Now… what are you looking for?” (Wells)
“A frame for a poster.” (Coy)
“Let’s see what we have… oh. I think this will be what you’re looking for.” (Wells)
Wells then showed Coy a special frame for posters. This one had an overhead light to display it in the dark. And even though even Spoiler-san thinks it’s gaudy, the frame was gold.
“It’s nice and all… but don’t you have something a little less expensive?” (Coy)
“We had ones with just plain black frames, but conveniently we’re sold out.” (Wells)
“Yeah… it’s too convenient. I’ll be back, I need to think about this.” (Coy)
Coy then left Wells’ shop and contemplated on what to do.
“What do I do? I want to get Yuki that frame, but it’s just too expensive.” (Coy)
He then conveniently saw Cecil’s gun store which was across the street from Wells’ shop.
“I think I got an idea…” (Coy)
Now on to Christmas, which was the next day. What, did Spoiler-san forget to mention that the first part of this story was on Christmas Eve? Anyways, now we’re at the living room of the apartment that Coy and Yuki share.
“Yuki, I hope that you will like your present?” (Coy)
“The feeling is mutual, Coy.” (Yuki)
They then unwrapped their presents, both surprised at what they had gotten.
“A holster… for my revolver?” (Coy)
“A frame… for my Pr*Cur* poster?” (Yuki)
And then it was time for the confession.
“Yuki… I have a confession. I sold my revolver to buy you the frame for your poster.” (Coy)
“I have a confession as well. I sold my poster to buy you that holster.” (Yuki)
“So basically saying… we ended up buying each other useless gifts?” (Coy)
“It looks like it. Did you save the receipts?” (Yuki)
“Yup, I sure did.” (Coy)
“Same here. Let’s go out tomorrow and buy our things back?” (Yuki)
“Yuki, you read my mind.” (Coy)
“That’s my catchphrase.” (Coy)
But this is supposed to be “Gift of the Magi”? The moral of the story is that your selflessness is a sign of how much your care, how far you’re willing to go to show your love for each other and how priceless your love really is?
“Then I don’t think you’ve been reading up, Spoiler-san.” (Coy)
“Despite marrying me, Coy mainly did it out of convenience. He’s still conflicted on his feelings towards me, which is mutual.” (Yuki)
But this is non-canon!?
“Which explains the lack of Nakano.” (Yuki)
Whatever, story’s over. THE END!!!
Sorry about that folks, but apparently this inter-company crossover special is too much for our cast right now. Still, on to the next story.
A Christmas Carol?
Abel Mechana (Lost Justice) was a greedy man. And there was one holiday that he hated the most, Christmas. And it was that time of the year, but he didn’t care about the gifts or merriment. For he was a money lender, you see. This was the time of year where he would harvest from those foolish enough to borrow money from his firm. It was the only time of the year where his greed could be satisfied.
“Yes, Mr. Mechana?” (Niko)
“Have you finished with the eviction notices?” (Lost)
“All ready, Mr. Mechana.” (Niko)
Niko was the only employee under Abel Mechana’s employ. He worked for a meager salary to support his family, but it was expected with the current economy.
“Good. Be sure that they are delivered tomorrow.” (Lost)
“But Mr. Mechana sir, tomorrow is Christmas?” (Niko)
“I was hoping to get the day off tomorrow.” (Niko)
“Christmas, bah humbug.” (Lost)
Not long after, Lost’s nephew Coy came into his uncle’s firm.
“Merry Christmas, Uncle Mechana.” (Coy)
“Bah humbug. Merry Christmas? If I had my way, then every idiot with that on their lips would be boiled in their own pudding and have a stake of holly driven through their heart.” (Lost)
“Uncle, you say that every year.” (Coy)
“Wait, wait, wait! Why is Coy playing the nephew when Lost’s playing Scrooge? He’s Lost’s son?” (Niko)
“Because that’s how we’ve been cast. Do you want to anger Spoiler-san again? I’ve still not forgiven you over the fish cannery.” (Coy)
“Fine… sorry.” (Niko)
Now getting back on track after a certain idiot’s interference… there was a knock on the door. Coy opened it to discover the two charity workers DJ the half-elf and Zeke the dwarf at the door.
“Now who’s not following the script?” (Niko)
“Fine… how can I assist you two… gentlemen?” (Coy)
“We are making our rounds to gather donations for the poor, boyo.” (Zeke)
“What he said.” (DJ)
“Well, I think my uncle can help?” (Coy)
Coy then let in the two charity workers and introduced them to his uncle.
“Sir, may we please have a donation to help feed the poor?” (Zeke)
“Would you like to be put under anonymous?” (DJ)
“I would like to be put down for none.” (Lost)
“But sir, the poor need all the comfort that they can get this time of year.” (Zeke)
“What about the prisons and the work houses? Are those to be in operation?” (Lost)
“I regret to say that they are.” (Zeke)
“Good, I was afraid that my taxes were going to waste.” (Lost)
“But sir… people would rather die than go there.” (DJ)
“Then let them. It would help with the surplus population.” (Lost)
“Sir, you are a monster!” (Zeke and DJ)
“If I am, then so be it. Now leave my place of business before I feed the two of you lead!” (Lost)
Lost then drew his revolvers, giving our poor charity works the hint and they ran out of the building as he fired shots.
“Wow… your father REALLY gets into his roles.” (Niko)
“It’s embarrassing, but true.” (Coy)
That last little bit of fourth wall breaking out of the way, the show continues.
“Charity workers, the biggest pests in our society.” (Lost)
“It’s sad to see that you think that, uncle.” (Coy)
“Now that they are gone, why have you come here nephew?” (Lost)
“I’ve come to invite you to Christmas dinner, like I do every year dear uncle.” (Coy)
“I don’t even see why you married, the dowry was too meager. Or this holiday, it’s done you no good.” (Lost)
“Uncle, I married Yuki because I… uh… what’s my line again?” (Coy)
It’s that you married her because you love her.
“Did you really forget about the last skit, Spoiler-san?” (Coy)
Just say the line before I send you back to the fish cannery!!!
“Well you don’t have to get your knickers in a bunch.” (Coy)
Fine, just get to the next part of the line. Spoiler-san will let it pass this time.
“Thank you. Now Uncle, I think Christmas has done me good each and every year. So I shall keep celebrating it. And a Merry Christmas to you, uncle.” (Coy)
And with that, Coy left.
“Now that my nephew is gone, what were we talking about Niko?” (Lost)
“About me having the day off tomorrow, Mr. Mechana.” (Niko)
“Do you really want to have Christmas off?” (Lost)
“Yes, sir.” (Niko)
“Fine, but I’ll be docking you half a day’s pay. Just be here earlier the next morning.” (Lost)
“Thank you, Mr. Mechana.” (Niko)
“Christmas? Bah humbug.” (Lost)
After work that night, Lost did his usual routine of eating at… the maid cafe? What in the hell!?
“As both the Shrine Maid and Chloe from LSPL work there, how can it be anything else?” (Coy)
You have Spoiler-san there. Now leave and don’t return until your next scene.
Lost ate the cheapest meal, refusing the maid service as it costs extra before heading home.
“Please return, master” (Chloe)
“Trust me, I will.” (Lost)
Ugh… he returned to his abode, which wasn’t originally his. It belonged to his late partner, Dale Walton who had died on Christmas Day ten years earlier. As he turned his key to unlock the door, he could had sworn he heard his late partner’s voice.
“Abel Mechana…” (Walton)
“Wait… what?” (Lost)
When he looked at the knocker, he could had sworn he saw the face of Dale Walton.
“Abel Mechana…” (Walton)
Scared, Lost opened his door and slammed it after getting inside of the manor that had no source of light except the single candle he carried around to save money. After lighting the candle, he walked upstairs to his bedroom where he changed into his night shirt and cap. After putting a meager amount of coal into the fireplace and lighting it, he blew out his candle and laid down on his bed. But again, he heard that voice. But this time it was accompanied be the rattle of chains.
“Abel Mechana…” (Walton)
“Dale? Dale Walton, is that you?” (Lost)
“It is I… your late partner Dale Walton…” (Walton)
“Do you not trust your own eyes… Abel Mechana, you lug?” (Walton)
“The slight mismanagement of food can fool the senses. For all I know you could be a stale piece of bread or an undigested chunk of cheese.” (Lost)
“Look, let’s just skip the skepticism and get to the point?” (Walton)
“Fine by me.” (Lost)
Wait… that’s not in the script!
“Do you want to be sleeping with the fishes, Spoiler-san?” (Walton)
Gulp… fine, do it your way.
“Good. Now Abel, I really am Dale Walton.” (Walton)
“But why do you wear those chains?” (Lost)
“These are the chains that I had forged through life, like by link. But your chains are much longer and much heavier.” (Walton)
“I don’t know what ya mean?” (Lost)
“These chains are my greed, Abel. My penitence for those I could had helped, but I didn’t.” (Walton)
“But you were such a great man in life?” (Lost)
“No, I was nothing more than a greedy bastard. Money was all I could see. Now Abel Mechana, you need to look past the money.” (Walton)
“Look past the money? Are you mad?” (Lost)
“No, I am not mad. You will be visited by three spirits tonight, you lug.” (Walton)
“Wait… by three more of you?” (Lost)
“The first will be at the stroke of one, the second at the stroke of two, and the third at the stroke of three.” (Walton)
“Can’t I just see all three of them and get it over with?” (Lost)
“No, you lug. Now… you have been warned…” (Walton)
And with that, the ghost of Dale Walton disappeared.
“Three spirits? Bah humbug.” (Lost)
Lost Justice then went to bed, shrugging it off. But he shouldn’t had done that. Why you ask? Because sure as Dale Walton said, the first spirit arrived at the stroke of one.
“Abel Mechana!” (Nagisa)
“Nagisa!? You’re playing the Ghost of Christmas Past?” (Lost)
“Is there a problem with it?” (Nagisa)
She asked that while making the ‘tsun’ face.
“Good. Now Abel Mechana, I’ve come for you.” (Nagisa)
“But why, spirit?” (Lost)
“I am the Ghost of Christmas Past. And I’m here to take you on a journey to your past.” (Nagisa)
“But I don’t want to go.” (Lost)
“Too bad.” (Nagisa)
She then grabbed Lost Justice by the wrist and they took flight. They traveled to Lost’s past, starting at the school where he was forced to stay as a boy. After observing a few years of that in less than five minutes, they went to a certain Christmas where Lost was working his first job at Jacob Host’s… banana factory? What is with the banana factories!?
“I’m sure that you remember this place as well?” (Nagisa)
“How could I forget, Jacob Host was a fine boss. His son on the other hand… Billy Bob’s a jerk.” (Lost)
“That is beside the point.” (Nagisa)
Right there… a young Lost Justice and Dale Walton were summoned by Mr. Host himself. Let’s just refer to the younger Lost as Abel and the younger Walton as Dale, okay? Anyways, they were summoned.
“Dale, Abel, it’s time to close shop. Now get the shutters, we’re having a Christmas Party tonight!” (Jacob Host)
“Sir, yes sir!” (Abel and Dale)
And with that, they closed up shop at a lightning fast speed. Now let’s just fast forward to the party that night. While Dale was talking to a forest elf, Abel was being a wallflower. Not too long, Jacob came over to him.
“Abel, why are you not enjoying the festivities?” (Jacob Host)
“It’s just… I feel uncomfortable at these kind of events, sir.” (Abel)
“Then what about if you had a dance partner?” (Jacob Host)
“Wait… what?” (Abel)
“There’s a girl I’d like you to meet. Oh Mizuki!” (Jacob Host)
And with that, a girl that was the same age as the young Abel came into the seen.
“Hello, my name is Mizuki Kaizaki.” (Mizuki)
“Wait a minute!!!” (Nagisa)
What is it now!?
“Abel-san, who’s this?” (Nagisa)
“Remember that fiancé I said that I had in the Old World?” (Lost)
“That’s her.” (Lost)
Let Spoiler-san explain, we used her as you were cast as the Ghost of Christmas Past.
“But I’m his wife!” (Nagisa)
Hey, we already cast your son as the nephew. Now shut up and get back to the story before Spoiler-san turns this place into a fish cannery!
“Ugh, fine. But Abel, we’re talking about this later.” (Nagisa)
“Yes, ma’am.” (Lost)
Ugh… now moving on, this was when Abel met Mizuki.
“Why hello there, I’m Abel Mechana.” (Abel)
“How about I leave you two youngsters alone to talk?” (Jacob Host)
“Wait… what?” (Abel)
And before he could pay any attention, Jacob Host left the two of them alone.
“So… are you not good with parties either?” (Mizuki)
“Nope, but do ya wanna try to dance anyway?” (Abel)
And with that, they went out to the dance floor and danced the night away. Now let’s fast forward to a few years later, after they were engaged. The scene is that they are sitting at a bench in the park.
“Abel Mechana, do I have to tell my parents this year that there will be no wedding as well?” (Mizuki)
“Mizuki my dear, I’m trying to save enough money to secure our future.” (Abel)
“Money, that’s all you ever talk about. Do you love money more than you love me?” (Mizuki)
“Mizuki, I’m doing this for us.” (Abel)
“No, you are doing this for yourself. I’m giving you a choice here, Abel Mechana. Either me or the money.” (Mizuki)
Abel could not answer. His silence was Mizuki’s answer.
“This is goodbye, Abel Mechana.” (Mizuki)
She then got up and left. Out of anger, Lost yelled at his younger self.
“You… dumb ass!!! Go after her, you will regret it!!!” (Lost)
“Did I not mention, these are not but shadows of the past? Also… what was that about?” (Nagisa)
Nagisa, this was part of the script!
“Don’t you dare interfere!” (Nagisa)
That ‘tsun’ face doesn’t scare Spoiler-san… as much as it scares other people. So Spoiler-san is just going to end your part here. Lost realized the regret he had for not going after Mizuki and woke up in his bed. Not long after… it was the stroke of two.
“Wait… you’re playing the Ghost of Christmas Present?” (Lost)
“Who else would be better for the part, yes?” (Inarihime)
“You have me there.” (Lost)
Let’s continue with the story!!!
“Fine.” (Lost and Inarihime)
Anyways, Lost Justice was visited by the ghost of Christmas Present.
“Abel-kun, I am the Ghost of Christmas Present. I am here to show you the Christmas of this year.” (Inarihime)
“Let’s just do it before Spoiler-san has an aneurism?” (Lost)
“Fair enough. Just grab on to the sleeve of my kimono and we will be on our way.” (Inarihime)
He grabbed her sleeve and before he knew it, it was morning and they were in the middle of town.
“This part is boring. How about we go straight to young Hayate’s abode, yes?” (Inarihime)
“Why not?” (Lost)
So skipping a very minor part of the story, they were in the house of Lost’s nephew Coy.
“This is where Coy lives? Wait a moment… this is the same apartment used in the “Gift of the Magi” skit!” (Lost)
We had budget constraints, all right?
Anyways, Coy and Yuki were celebrating Christmas with their friends Cecil, Wells, and Nakano. What? Kimiko was used in the background of the maid cafe.
“How about a game, eh?” (Cecil)
“That’s a good idea. How about a game of ‘Yes and no’?” (Wells)
Wow… Wells is getting more lines in this special than she does get in LGDK.
“I say let’s do it.” (Coy)
With everyone in agreement, they drew straws to see who would go first. The winner was Coy.
“Alright, I’m thinking of something… silly.” (Coy)
“Is it greedy?” (Nakano)
“Is it an animal, vegetable, or mineral?” (Wells)
“That question goes against the rules, but you can say it’s an animal.” (Coy)
“Does it hate people?” (Cecil)
“Does it hate Christmas?” (Nakano)
“Oh yes.” (Coy)
“Wait… greedy, could be an animal, hates people and Christmas? Is it your uncle?” (Yuki)
“Ding, ding, ding, we have a winner!” (Coy)
“Hey now!” (Lost)
“Do not forget Abel-kun, we are just shadows here.” (Inarihime)
“Was that just a pun?” (Lost)
“No, but it could be.” (Inarihime)
That’s it! Coy and Yuki had fun with their friends and now the scene is at Niko’s house with his wonderful wife, Ana.
“Wait a moment!” (Ana)
“Why do I have to play the wife of the fool?” (Ana)
Would you rather play one of the daughters?
Look, we all know you blush at the thought of you being together with Niko. Get over it!
“I do not blush at that!” (Ana)
Do you want Spoiler-san to replace your home with a fish cannery!?
Good. Anyway, it was before they were home and their meager Christmas dinner was cooking. Niko’s two daughters, Miyuki and Chloe who works part time at the maid cafe from earlier were all waiting patiently for their father and little brother Tiny Tom to come home.
What do you want!?
“Why does Miyuki have to play a daughter and not the mother?” (Miyuki)
Because Ana looks more mature. Now shut up or the house is a fish cannery!?
Seriously, this is getting no where. Anyway, the table had just been set and Niko comes through the door with Tiny Tom on his shoulders. And before you ask, yes. He was the ginger boy who calls Niko “Big Bro” from the orphanage in LSPL.
“I’m home.” (Niko)
“Welcome home… d-d-d-de-dear.” (Ana)
Oh you can’t be serious, she’s blushing!!!
“Daddy!” (Chloe and Miyuki)
The both of them came up to Niko for a hug after he had set down Tiny Tom.
“My daughters, thank you for forgoing coming to church on Christmas Day to help your mother.” (Niko)
Did he really have to say that?
“Niko… was Tommy behaving?” (Ana)
“Oh, Sister Meredith thought he was as good as gold.” (Niko)
“That’s our… s-s-s-s-so-son.” (Ana)
Seriously? She needs to stop stuttering and blushing!
“Yup, always thinking of those even less fortunate than him.” (Niko)
Right there, Lost noticed that Tiny Tom was walking with the aid of a crutch.
“That boy, Tom. Will he be all right?” (Lost)
“I am the Ghost of Christmas Present. But I can see… a crutch without an owner leaning against an empty chair. Although that is if nothing is done in time.” (Inarihime)
“No… not Tiny Tom?” (Lost)
“But why should it matter? It helps deal with the surplus population, yes?” (Inarihime)
“No, I refuse to believe it. That family may be feasting on a bird that makes a pigeon look like a turkey, but that child still has faith in humanity!” (Lost)
“The future is up to you. And speaking of which, my time is up. It is up to the next spirit to guide you.” (Inarihime)
“Wait, don’t go!” (Lost)
Right then, Lost was in the fog. When he was able to see past it, he could tell his surroundings. He was in a grave yard. And then a figure approached him. Skeletal, and wearing darkened glasses and a pure black long-coat… wait! What are you doing here, Zedda?
-I’m on loan from Dark Jackal. Now get back to narrating before I waste one of my remaining six rounds in Arksis on you.- (Zedda)
Gulp… Lost called out to the figure.
“Are you the Ghost of what is yet to come?” (Lost)
-Does it matter, human?- (Zedda)
“You are the one that I fear most.” (Lost)
-Let’s just get to business, before I start shooting.- (Zedda)
The Reaper Lord Jurisanti’s most trusted servant didn’t ask, he demanded. Now the scene has changed back to Niko’s household, everyone seemed like they were in mourning. They were talking about how down Niko was, how he seemed to walk slower on his way home each time. And just to speed things up, we’re going back to the graveyard, where Zedda pointed at a certain grave marker. Lost reluctantly went to it.
“No… this cannot be.” (Lost)
The grave was that of Tiny Tom, Niko’s one and only son. Zedda then pointed to another grave, which Lost also came up to reluctantly.
-We don’t got all day.- (Zedda)
I know.” (Lost)
Lost then hurried up his pace in fear of Jurisanti’s most trusted servant. He was in shock, he was stepping on his own grave.
“So… it’s not just Tiny Tom? Spirit, I must ask one thing. Are the events that you have shown me what will be, or what may be only?” (Lost)
-Your death is inevitable. Does it matter what you do, human? It will make no difference in the end.- (Zedda)
“I dare challenge that, spirit. I will change these events. And I will keep the spirit of Christmas past, present, and future in my heart. Not just on Christmas, but everyday from now on.” (Lost)
-There is only one way to tell, human.- (Zedda)
Jurisanti’s most trusted servant then aimed his trusty weapon at Lost and shot him in the chest. Don’t worry, this is not but a dream and non-canon. So he didn’t really waste a bullet on Lost Justice. Speaking of him, he just woke up after falling out of his bed.
“What… I’m alive?” (Lost)
He then ran to the window, where he saw a passerby. It was Nyra, a night elf.
“Young Woman, what day be this!?” (Lost)
“Why, it’s Christmas day!” (Nyra)
“What do ya know? I haven’t missed it. Girl, you know the prized turkey at the market?” (Lost)
“You mean the one bigger than me?” (Nyra)
“That’s the one. Smart girl you are.” (Lost)
“Hey, I’m older than I look!” (Nyra)
“Here, take this!” (Lost)
He then threw a purse full of coins out the window and they landed near her feet.
“Go buy it for me and have it delivered to… wait, what is Niko’s last name?” (Lost)
How would you expect Spoiler-san to know? Spoiler-san’s vessel is the one who writes this stuff, not Spoiler-san!
“Let’s just say Niko’s house, okay?” (Lost)
As Spoiler-san is the narrator, Spoiler-san will allow it.
“Okay then. Have it delivered to Niko’s house! Also, you can keep the change!” (Lost)
“Yes, sir!” (Nyra)
The legal loli then rushed off to the market. Lost Justice then changed from his night clothes and got dressed. After getting dressed in his Sunday best, he headed outside where he ran into the charity workers he shot at yesterday.
“I’ve been looking for you two.” (Lost)
“Please, don’t shoot!?” (Zeke and DJ)
“I’m not going to shoot you, I want to make a donation.” (Lost)
“What!?” (Zeke and DJ)
He then forced a huge purse of coins into Zeke’s arms.
“But sir…” (Zeke)
“Not enough, then take this!” (Lost)
He then forced another one into the dwarf’s arms.
“Are you sure?” (Zeke)
“Yes, and not a farthing less!” (Lost)
“Thank you very much, sir!” (DJ and Zeke)
Lost then smiled, heading for his nephew’s house. At every person he met, he tipped his hat and wished them a Merry Christmas. He then made it to his destination and knocked on the door. Coy answered.
“Oh dear nephew of mine, I came to accept that offer from yesterday.” (Lost)
“Wait… what!?” (Coy)
“You heard me, I want to join you for Christmas Dinner.” (Lost)
“Then come on in.” (Coy)
He came inside where he was formally introduced to Coy’s wife and friends. They were all surprised as they knew of Lost Justice’s reputation. It was a great Christmas, they had a great dinner and played many games. Lost looked like he had the time of his life, before it was time to head home.
“Thank you for coming, Mr. Mechana.” (Yuki)
“No, thank you for having me. My nephew’s picked a fine bride.” (Lost)
Despite the size of her breasts.
What? Anyway Lost headed home to get enough sleep to wake up early. He had a prank planned, one that would take everything he had to hold in. The next morning, he arrived early to make sure he was there before Niko. He hid as Niko came in, five minutes late.
He was acting his former role flawlessly.
“Mr. Mechana!? I can explain!” (Niko)
“Oh, there’s nothing to explain. Niko, how many years have ya worked under my employ?” (Lost)
“Five years… sir.” (Niko)
“And for the past five years, you’ve been nothing more than a mere accountant.” (Lost)
“Yes, sir.” (Niko)
“I think it’s high time I’ve done this.” (Lost)
“Please, sir, don’t!?” (Niko)
“I’m… giving you a promotion.” (Lost)
“Please, anything but… what?” (Niko)
“I’m giving you a promotion. And that comes with a raise.” (Lost)
“Sir… are you all right?” (Niko)
“I’m fine, Niko. Now… throw some more coal into the furnace, it’s freezing in here.” (Lost)
“Yes, sir!” (Niko)
And with that, Niko added more coal to the fire. It was the first time that the office felt so warm. As for the eviction notices that were supposed to be delivered, they were thrown into the furnace to help heat up the joint. Lost Justice gave everyone an extension. As for Tiny Tom, he didn’t die. Lost paid for the much needed operation out of his own pocket. And he became a second father to the young boy, promising him a position into the company when he was old enough.
“Both the Deity and the spirits bless us, everyone!” (Tommy)
And that friends was our version of “A Christmas Carol”. Spoiler-san just hopes that Charles Dickens isn’t rolling in his grave right now. Spoiler-san apologizes for this poor version of the ultimate Christmas classic. And Spoiler-san wasn’t expecting Zedda of all beings to be there either. Anyway, we have one skit left. A Christmas song that’s not too old, but Spoiler-san’s vessel likes it. So please, enjoy?
His Favorite Christmas Story
Coy met her up in Delaware in nineteen thirty-seven, she was wearing red lipstick to match her pretty dress. On December twenty-fourth at a quarter ‘till eleven, he finally gained the courage to ask Yuki to dance.
“May I take this dance?” (Coy)
It was the night before Christmas, it was love at first sight. The carolers sang as they danced through the night. She was a small town girl, he was a traveling guy. He never caught her name before they said their goodbyes.
“I gotta go.” (Coy)
“Crap… I forgot to get her name. Oh well, not like I’ll regret it?” (Coy)
A couple years later, he was out on the road. Having Christmas dinner at a… maid cafe alone? It’s supposed to be a diner!
“Hey, due to budget constraints we’re reusing the set.” (Coy)
Fine… anyway, he saw a young waitress with a gleam in her eye. Her favorite day of the year, she showed her spirits were high.
“Sir, could you shed a little holiday cheer?” (Chloe)
A simple Christmas story was all she wanted to hear. He looked prepared as he started to say…
“Here’s my favorite Christmas story about a girl with no name. I met her up in Delaware in nineteen thirty-seven, she was wearing red lipstick to match her pretty dress. On December twenty-fourth at a quarter ‘till eleven is when I finally gained the courage to ask her to dance.” (Coy)
Every holiday season as he traveled he’d tell about his Christmas dance partner that he never knew well. He’d share his favorite story to the locals he met. He was called the “Christmas story telling traveling man”.
By age fifty-three he had done settled down. All the neighborhood kids liked to gather around, just to listen to his stories of his life on the road. All he had were these children he told. And every Christmas eve they showed up before dark, he’d tell all the story but they knew it by heart. They could quote it word for word, he always told it the same. It was his favorite Christmas story about the girl with no name. He said,
“I met her up in Delaware in nineteen thirty-seven, she was wearing red lipstick to match her pretty dress. On December twenty-fourth at a quarter ‘till eleven is when I finally gained the courage to ask her to dance.” (Coy)
Twenty years later as he took his last breath, it was on a cold Christmas morning on a hospital bed. The children were grown, he had nobody left. Except the little old nurse who was holding his hand. He said,
“Ma’am could you spread a little holiday cheer?” (Coy)
A simple Christmas story was all he wanted to hear. But his eyes filled with tears as she spoke, because his favorite Christmas story was the one that she told. She said,
“I met him up in Delaware in nineteen thirty-seven though I never got caught his name, he was a traveling man. On December twenty-fourth at a quarter ‘till eleven… I’m so glad he got the courage to ask me to dance.” (Yuki)
And that friends was the first LGDK/LSPL Christmas Crossover Spectacular. Spoiler-san was glad to be your host. But… we have one more guest, so Spoiler-san has to get out of narrator-mode.
“May we please welcome… Santa Clause!” (Spoiler-san)
Right there, the big man himself shown up. Plump with white hair and a beard while wearing his famous red suit, that was jolly old St. Nick himself.
“Santa, welcome to the show.” (Spoiler-san)
“Ho-ho-ho, I’m so glad to be here.” (Santa)
“Same here. So… do you have a gift for Spoiler-san?” (Spoiler-san)
“I believe I do. But… it’s being delivered to you in the best way to suit you.” (Santa)
“It is? Spoiler-san can’t wait.” (Spoiler-san)
“You don’t need to, it’s here now.” (Santa)
Right there, Spoiler-san heard a very familiar noise.
“Beep, beep!” (Truck-kun)
“Oh snap…” (Spoiler-san)
Spoiler-san was then hit by Truck-kun, who was loaded full of coal.
“All’s well that ends well. Merry Christmas to all, and to all a good night! Ho-ho-ho!” (Santa)
The casts of both LGDK and LSPL then came out to give a bow. This included the special guest Zedda from “A Living Will”. And yes, he was given a present as well. A little red firetruck.
After Note: Thank you all for reading this long Christmas Special. And thanks to Dark Jackal for showing his holiday spirit and lending me Zedda. When he made his post about not doing a Christmas Special, I just had to ask him. Anyway, Merry Christmas everyone!!!
If you want to read “A Living Will”, it’s linked on my Recommend Reads page.