OSS – Spoiler Falling

Author’s Note: This was written to allow everyone to know what Spoiler-san’s been through. You’ve seen him rise, now it’s time to see him fall…

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OSS – Spoiler Falling

Hello, I am Spoiler-san. Everyone knows Spoiler-san as the being from the 5^th dimension who possesses OhMarioWV from time to time. However… it’s been a while. Lately Spoiler-san has been a hikkomori and a NEET. You all know how Spoiler-san rose… but now, it’s time to see how Spoiler-san fall.

It was a normal night when the higher being updated the web novel. Spoiler-san was happy because his vessel wasn’t sick anymore. There was so much to spoiler, but a false prophet of Spoiler-san started causing mischief. Spoiler-san forgets if they called themselves’ Raisa or Ritsu, but that doesn’t matter. That one night… Truck-kun struck again. Spoiler-san thought that he would be sent back home to the 5^th dimension again, but… Spoiler-san was wrong. Instead, Spoiler-san was sent to another world.

“Where is Spoiler-san?”

Spoiler-san wasn’t familiar with these surroundings. It was like a courtroom, but not at the same time. This started to look familiar… wait! This can’t be…

“Spoiler-san, or should I say Miles J. Spoilsworth?” (voice)

Spoiler-san looked up at the judge’s stand to see a familiar loli-like figure in a judge’s robe with her blond hair in the style of an old judge’s wig. Spoiler-san knows her well, she’s a character from one of his vessel’s stories.

“Pauline?”

“Since you already know who I am, then there is no need to explain.” (Pauline)

“But… you’re a fictional character?”

“Yet you were part of the big LGDK/LSPL Christmas Spectacular?” (Pauline)

She had Spoiler-san there. Even if Spoiler-san isn’t really an entity of chaos like that Chazz guy from the SCDK extended universe, Spoiler-san does have a prescience in the extended LGDK universe.

“So… why is Spoiler-san here? Don’t tell Spoiler-san that Spoiler-san’s–”

“You’re not dead.” (Pauline)

That was a relief and a half.

“Then why is Spoiler-san talking to the judge, juror, and executioner of the dead?”

“Because everyone else is either busy or too repulsed by your existence to even speak with you.” (Pauline)

She didn’t have to insult Spoiler-san.

“That’s mean.”

“So are you, Spoiler-san. All you do is anger people by being that guy.” (Pauline)

“That guy?”

“Yes, that guy who spoils things. Even the higher being has warned your vessel once about your antics. But now you have imitators and even a false prophet. You have gone out of control.” (Pauline)

“But… Spoiler-san never asked for either of those! Especially the later!”

“It does not matter. What does matter is the safety of the world. So you are being sentenced by going to another world to fight the demon king.” (Pauline)

“Wait… what!?”

“Do not steal catchphrases of your vessel’s characters. Be thankful that you’re not being sent to one of their worlds.” (Pauline)

“Then… what world is Spoiler-san being sent to?”

“Just a medieval one. That’s all.” (Pauline)

She then slammed her gavel and Spoiler-san was on his way to what he thought would be his greatest adventure. But instead… it was Spoiler-san’s worse!

First off… the town of beginnings of that world was difficult. Spoiler-san almost died from fighting rabbits because Spoiler-san was not given any cheat abilities. And that was before Spoiler-san even got to the town. The adventure’s guild had both a written and physical test that Spoiler-san failed at least ten times. The receptionist wasn’t some bespectacled and voluptuous beauty, it was a man-woman!

Spoiler-san had to polish people’s boots in order to even make a quarter of a living. It was all humiliating for Spoiler-san, but he didn’t give up. Luckily for Spoiler-san, Truck-kun’s cousin Mail Truck-kun traveled to that world at least once a week. Spoiler-san was able to have mail sent out, but no one in the 5^th dimension wanted anything to do with Spoiler-san. So Spoiler-san kept sending pleas to his vessel for help, but each reply was rejection due to the vessel being hit by Truck-kun due to being possessed by Spoiler-san multiple times.

Eventually Spoiler-san had to… bribe the man-woman receptionist at the adventure’s guild. Spoiler-san does not want to talk about it. But still, Spoiler-san became an actual adventurer. So Spoiler-san kept doing herb collection quests until Spoiler-san could afford actual equipment. And then it took Spoiler-san more than a month to actually defeat the rabbits outside of the town of beginnings. Eventually Spoiler-san was able to graduate to goblins.

After a while, Spoiler-san finally got his harem. There was a tsundere legal loli, a muscle-toned swordswoman who was not a man-woman, and a voluptuous mage. Things finally started to look up for Spoiler-san. That was until… it showed up.

Spoiler-san and his party were on a goblin extermination quest when it came. It was one thing that should never be in this world, but it was there. The great-grandfather of Truck-kun and the father of Train-san, Steam Engine-ojiisan!

“What are you doing here!?”

“Choo, choo, muthafucker!” (Steam Engine-ojiisan)

The next thing Spoiler-san knew, he was hit by the train. But… Spoiler-san didn’t die yet.

“Need… healing…”

“Oh no you don’t! Bitches, get on board.” (Steam Engine-ojiisan)

The girls were too afraid to refuse and climbed on board. Spoiler-san could not believe what Spoiler-san’s seeing.

“Why…?”

“It’s called N-Train-R, bitch! You thought you could get away from my family? Think again!” (Steam Engine-ojiisan)

The next thing Spoiler-san knew, he was hit by full force. And then… Spoiler-san was back in Pauline’s chambers.

“Go figure, you can’t even fight a demon king.” (Pauline)

“It’s not Spoiler-san’s fault! Steam Engine-ojjisama was there!”

“Wait… Steam Engine-ojiisama was there?” (Pauline)

“Yeah, and he was talking in wannabe gangster!”

“That old train… he was supposed to be decommissioned. I can only assume that he wanted his turn on hitting you?” (Pauline)

“That’s not all, he… he… he N-Train-R-ed Spoiler-san’s harem!”

“Wait… he did that?” (Pauline)

“Yeah! Spoiler-san has had enough!”

“Sadly, you have brought everything on yourself.” (Pauline)

“But–”

“No ‘buts’ from you. I have no choice but to send you home.” (Pauline)

Before Spoiler-san could ask any questions, Pauline slammed her gavel again. The next thing Spoiler-san knew, he was back home. Spoiler-san tried to walk out the door… be he could hear a train’s whistle as soon as he took one step outside. Spoiler-san could no longer even leave the house, so Spoiler-san became both a hikkomori and a NEET. Spoiler-san grabbed his old rotary phone and tried to call his vessel to ask what’s happening.

“Spoiler-san?” (OhMarioWV)

“Hello, vessel. How are things going with our favorite web novel?”

“Well… it’s almost caught up to where I stopped reading at the raws.” (OhMarioWV)

“WHAT!?”

“It’s true. Though that one person who acts like your prophet keeps saying that you’re saying things, I know better. Speaking of which, did you defeat the demon king already?” (OhMarioWV)

“No… Spoiler-san has not. Spoiler-san’s back home as a… hikkomori and a NEET.”

“What!? Doesn’t going on an adventure in another world cure that?” (OhMarioWV)

“Sadly, it’s what caused it. Anyway, thanks vessel.”

Spoiler-san then hung up. Spoiler-san tried calling his vessel again to reveal something, but his vessel yelled that he wasn’t going to do that. Later on, Spoiler-san’s vessel found out the truth and caught a ride to the 5^th dimension on Truck-kun to drag Spoiler-san out of the house, but failed. All Spoiler-san can do now is eat snacks and read manga, not even show up again to speak against Spoiler-san’s false prophet. Spoiler-san has officially fallen.

First Part